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~ Passion Play ~
The clock strikes 6.00pm and Roon was anxious. “Where the fuck is Avi?” he whispers to himself.
Roon was loosing his patience as he waited for hours for the man he calls his soul mate. Never did he expect in a million years, he would fall deeply in love with a man so soon in his life. Gone was the promiscuous age where he shagged any good looking queer man he laid his eyes on. Monogamy, once a taboo word, has found its way into a permanent lifestyle.
Avi, God damn knew, Roon was a perfect package. A hunk standing tall between the borders of striking good looks and charming personality, with a natural demeanor that oozes sex appeal.
As Avi dropped himself onto the couch thinking of cuddling himself in his man’s arm he was jolted by the sound of the doorbell. He jumped and sprint towards the door. With his heart palpating and mind hitting its black spot, he froze as he opened the door
There stood Roon, staring straight into Avi’s eyes. Roon clad in a simple T-shirt and jeans, has his cheeky smile on, further increasing the blood flow in Avi’s veins. Avi grabbed Roon by the neck pulling him close to him and kissed him endlessly.
They sat on the floor, talking as the day plunges into darkness. Roon could only find himself transfixed by his man’s ability of ignoring the sexual tension. Roon could no longer hold himself, as he drew himself closer to Avi and whispered into Avi’s ear. Roon finished his sentence with a kiss on Avi’s cheeks, moving passionately to his lips. Avi felt his hands tremble as if it was their first kiss, dwelling deep into lust and forbidden love.
Roon unbuttoned Avi’s shirt slowly as he kissed him, working the magic of love making like a craftsman working his lumber. Avi realized that he has no insecurities being naked in front of Roon. The comfort they shared was indeed a perfect chemistry and Roon knew he was at his very best when he’s with Avi. Avi is the only man that rages his passion to such height. They made love till dawn, living the moment they cherished the most.
Giving in to man’s biggest weakness, of physical play and unconditional love.
They bring the man and the woman out of one another perfectly, putting to shame sayings blasted at them by other, that only a man and a woman are meant for one another.
Indeed love is blind.
Epilogue
Epilogue
~Leave... Walk away....~
You left her in complete confusion.
You left, without a warning.
Leaving her behind, stranded alone in her darkest despair, assuming she would do fine without you. You know for sure that she would not be happy alone, yet you assume the contrary.
You left her confused, bewildered in her utmost fragile state, cold as stone.
She knew that she would never be able to lie in his arms again. She misses the comfort, the security, and the peace of knowing she's in the arms of the man she loves most. All she ever wanted was a closure.
A closure that would slap her back to reality.
A closure that would bless her with the strength to move on in her life.
A closure to mark the end of a relationship they held strong for years.
It was either that or a second chance in life itself.
A second chance from him, for them.
She watched him walk away, moving on in a life of his own, without any commitments. She fears for his life. She knows she won’t be able to move on easily. Yet she's left with no choice. She has to ignore the pain she has put herself in and swallow all the pain. She has no choice but to turn a blind eye of all the things she cares about when it came to him. She has to ignore and pretend.
“It’s impossible”, she thinks to herself. No matter what, she will wait.
She has decided she would wait for her man, no matter what it takes.
She has decided to be selfish and not let anyone change her mind.
Blinded by her immense emotions for him, she walks away. She walks away from her comfort zone, and awaits her moment.
For she knows one fine day she would be able to get her man back....
Even if the Gods turned her down, at the very least she dies trying…
~Leave... Walk away....~
You left her in complete confusion.
You left, without a warning.
Leaving her behind, stranded alone in her darkest despair, assuming she would do fine without you. You know for sure that she would not be happy alone, yet you assume the contrary.
You left her confused, bewildered in her utmost fragile state, cold as stone.
She knew that she would never be able to lie in his arms again. She misses the comfort, the security, and the peace of knowing she's in the arms of the man she loves most. All she ever wanted was a closure.
A closure that would slap her back to reality.
A closure that would bless her with the strength to move on in her life.
A closure to mark the end of a relationship they held strong for years.
It was either that or a second chance in life itself.
A second chance from him, for them.
She watched him walk away, moving on in a life of his own, without any commitments. She fears for his life. She knows she won’t be able to move on easily. Yet she's left with no choice. She has to ignore the pain she has put herself in and swallow all the pain. She has no choice but to turn a blind eye of all the things she cares about when it came to him. She has to ignore and pretend.
“It’s impossible”, she thinks to herself. No matter what, she will wait.
She has decided she would wait for her man, no matter what it takes.
She has decided to be selfish and not let anyone change her mind.
Blinded by her immense emotions for him, she walks away. She walks away from her comfort zone, and awaits her moment.
For she knows one fine day she would be able to get her man back....
Even if the Gods turned her down, at the very least she dies trying…
Infinity Downline
This was introduced by a friend i trust with all my guts and without a doubt, she was right in every way possible. Thanks Eva.
This is intended to those whom trust me. To those who are skeptical, feel free to ask me any questions. To those whom disagree or so kindly please ignore this.
Infinity Downline.
Learn all about it on this website :
https://www.infinitydownline.com/
Membership rate = RM100 spent
Introduction of a new friend = RM100 gained
In other words, the RM100 spent is regained in a instant.
NO ADMIN FEE or whatsoever
A great program and definitely THIS IS NOT A MLM scam.
Its a reverse up program that generates a steady RM100 income constantly. Probably on a daily basis.
Give me a buzz on Facebook for further clarification or drop me a mail at cva280888@gmail.com
Thanks
Sivaanan
In need of more 'me'...
Its one of those days where i just want to be alone.
To drift in my pitiful fantasies, to sulk and pamper myself.
Probably with some retail therapy and some short nap's.
However, that's not always the case...
Which gears up my mind, embracing the ultimate question. Will i actually achieve anything that i want? Or will Murphy's law be a bitch and take things under his control? Damn! The hell one has to endure finding the right answer to this. No matter what, we still dream, fantasize, pray and hope to achieve what we want. Here i am sitting in the train rushing off to work, only to realize, no matter how hard i worked on my life i tend to always fall back into square one. Not happy with what I'm doing, not emotionally and financially stable, and often overwhelmed with regrets of certain things i have done in my life.. The only positive event taking place right now is my boyfriend.
Even so, my insecurities on myself is a threat to the "us" we have now. Oh how i wish life ain't so complicated. There i go again wishing for something which i know would end up as another chapter in my book of unrealistic dreams.. I need to vent, yet my verbal skills in expressing the inner me is something i am unable to master. To pen it down seems to be too humiliating at times. The second question i keep asking, i wonder if I'm the only one going through this or is the entire world hitting this apocalyptic thought? Hmm... I'm confident in many ways compared to my friends. I dare say things out loud yet to talk about how depressing certain things are which i kept to myself for years seems to be the hardest thing to do.
Gah! I just need some 'me' time. No human contact no commitments and certainly no annoying screaming kids by my side. *Stares at kid sitting on the next seat.* My stop is here. Wouldn't it be great to achieve something as easy as boarding the train and getting off at our destination....
Ciao folks.
Have a great time in confusion land reading what i just wrote...
To drift in my pitiful fantasies, to sulk and pamper myself.
Probably with some retail therapy and some short nap's.
However, that's not always the case...
Which gears up my mind, embracing the ultimate question. Will i actually achieve anything that i want? Or will Murphy's law be a bitch and take things under his control? Damn! The hell one has to endure finding the right answer to this. No matter what, we still dream, fantasize, pray and hope to achieve what we want. Here i am sitting in the train rushing off to work, only to realize, no matter how hard i worked on my life i tend to always fall back into square one. Not happy with what I'm doing, not emotionally and financially stable, and often overwhelmed with regrets of certain things i have done in my life.. The only positive event taking place right now is my boyfriend.
Even so, my insecurities on myself is a threat to the "us" we have now. Oh how i wish life ain't so complicated. There i go again wishing for something which i know would end up as another chapter in my book of unrealistic dreams.. I need to vent, yet my verbal skills in expressing the inner me is something i am unable to master. To pen it down seems to be too humiliating at times. The second question i keep asking, i wonder if I'm the only one going through this or is the entire world hitting this apocalyptic thought? Hmm... I'm confident in many ways compared to my friends. I dare say things out loud yet to talk about how depressing certain things are which i kept to myself for years seems to be the hardest thing to do.
Gah! I just need some 'me' time. No human contact no commitments and certainly no annoying screaming kids by my side. *Stares at kid sitting on the next seat.* My stop is here. Wouldn't it be great to achieve something as easy as boarding the train and getting off at our destination....
Ciao folks.
Have a great time in confusion land reading what i just wrote...
~White Chickens
It has been ages since i last blogged. I'm gonna kick-start my blogging days and make it a weekly commitment at the very least.
Few nights back was one of those nights filled with a tiring and creepy dream. Started out as an innocent dream, where i found myself in my secondary school it drifted to creepy land once the sun was out. Yeah, my dreams are dramatic to its very last core.
The darkness of the night... in my dream that is, was possessing everyone i knew. I know i was standing alone somewhere when suddenly a stream of white chickens flocked their way through.
Thousands of them.
Running in a crazy manner away from the people around them. It look more like the chickens were scared of the people around.
Then came the creep factor. People were killing those chickens. Literally biting them and pulling their feathers off. Humans were zombies attaching chickens.
Steven Spielberg might get a new inspiration here...
I witnessed my best friend literally shredding a chicken with her bare hands and her teeth. It was sick and disgusting. I was running away from the whole massacre, running so fast i fell multiple times, injuring myself head to toe.
Heard a few screams around me. Bizarre screams from people i couldn't even recognize.
All of a sudden i opened my eyes and i realized mum was yelling downstairs, asking me to get my ass up as i was a little late for work.
I need a good interpretation of this.
I seriously do....
My lookout...
Whenever im in the mood to blog, theres always something to hinder my plans.
Something internal. My very own ridiculous thinking. Now im finally over it. Im finally getting up and hitting those key's.
This year has been nothing but hectic. Despite all the drama's i had to endure beginning of the year I was always able to keep my cool. Now, however, im on the tip of the ice berg. At any given moment i might collapse. A ball of mental stress is what i am made off now. All the work piling up in the office seems to be going nowhere. Ahh... Im in desperate need for a vacation!
Its not easy to handle a permanant job in a company dealing with multi billion dollar clients. The requirements needed to be fulfiled is massive. I never knew this much of work will be needed for what seems to be a small task.
Life has been topsy turvy all the time, yet regret is one thing i am avoiding. I don't regret nor do i want to regret the responsibilities i have succumbed into. I am growing in every way possible and all i can do is learn as much possible and be proud for being a mile ahead of many others out there.
What more can i ask for right now many ask, I have a stable job, a partner that is beyond amazing, a grear family, and financial stability. Yet the only thing that boggles me right now is my education. I want to go further, and not stop where i have stopped. Many things has come my way, and i had no choice but to put the books on hold. I need to persue what i am interested in and excel in it. Yet there are things in have to settle before i hit the higher platform. January will be a fresh start for me. A new environment i have been craving for. Finally a chance to hit back those dusty books!
For the first time in my life i cant wait for 2010.
A new beginning i would say. A completely new beginning.
Wednesday
4th November 2009
6.40p.m
Something internal. My very own ridiculous thinking. Now im finally over it. Im finally getting up and hitting those key's.
This year has been nothing but hectic. Despite all the drama's i had to endure beginning of the year I was always able to keep my cool. Now, however, im on the tip of the ice berg. At any given moment i might collapse. A ball of mental stress is what i am made off now. All the work piling up in the office seems to be going nowhere. Ahh... Im in desperate need for a vacation!
Its not easy to handle a permanant job in a company dealing with multi billion dollar clients. The requirements needed to be fulfiled is massive. I never knew this much of work will be needed for what seems to be a small task.
Life has been topsy turvy all the time, yet regret is one thing i am avoiding. I don't regret nor do i want to regret the responsibilities i have succumbed into. I am growing in every way possible and all i can do is learn as much possible and be proud for being a mile ahead of many others out there.
What more can i ask for right now many ask, I have a stable job, a partner that is beyond amazing, a grear family, and financial stability. Yet the only thing that boggles me right now is my education. I want to go further, and not stop where i have stopped. Many things has come my way, and i had no choice but to put the books on hold. I need to persue what i am interested in and excel in it. Yet there are things in have to settle before i hit the higher platform. January will be a fresh start for me. A new environment i have been craving for. Finally a chance to hit back those dusty books!
For the first time in my life i cant wait for 2010.
A new beginning i would say. A completely new beginning.
Wednesday
4th November 2009
6.40p.m
Goodbye....
It’s somehow hard-hitting to spill my mind on my recent breakup. It’s not about losing the 2 year relationship we held high, it’s not about losing the intense passion we shared, nor is it the care and comfort zone we belonged to.
It is the insecurity I now have in me. The insecurity of trusting the situation I am in.
But that’s another story….
With absolute debates in my own mind, I finally made my mind to walk out from the relationship I had for 2 years.
Now, all I am hoping for is for something good to turn out from my drastic decision.
Be it long term or short term… I’m moving on and I hope you would too.
I still care and I still hope for the best for you. I don’t hate you. All I want is to be happy and for you to be happy as well.
All the best in everything, and thanks for the great 2 years of “us”
~Q&A~
Emotions are changing… The pace I was once comfortable with is now merely within my reach. As I watch my life race pass me in speed of light, I fell to the ground only to realize how much I have missed. Subconsciously aware, yet I never allowed myself to think beyond. Here I am, striped bare, sensing the cold chills of my very own blunders.
“Things happen for a reason”
Good or bad, everything happens for a reason. Yet, discovering and realizing the core meaning of the reason seems troublesome. As for me, I vaguely manage to discover it.
Playing along is what I do best.
My words are starting to twist my life itself. Promises unfulfilled. Words spilled out from my lips before I could even think wisely on the consequences. God, I hate making promises in times of desperation, desperation, to lock my true contemplation, desperation to put a smile on someone else’s face besides mine.
I’m not Gandhi nor am I Mother Teresa, no doubt no one is. Yet, I allow the subtle bliss of locking my true emotions and thoughts just to watch others basking in the complete opposite.
“How long can I go on?” I ask myself. That’s when I find myself stranded in a corner of my room, figuring out answers to questions I know I can’t find, or never allowed myself to find. Days pass by, and repetition takes place. Again I find myself making the same mistake. Over and over again, and again I find myself, nearing to self realizations and constant self questioning. Next thing I know, no change has come.
Even at this very point, as I’m typing, my mind asks the same questions…
“How long can I go on?”
Then again, would this last at least another good 10minutes? Or will I finally bring upon myself a change I deserve? Or will I repeat my promises in disguise all over again? Am I alone in this orb of twisted words and abrupt awakenings?
Oh no! Not another set of questions.
“Things happen for a reason”
Good or bad, everything happens for a reason. Yet, discovering and realizing the core meaning of the reason seems troublesome. As for me, I vaguely manage to discover it.
Playing along is what I do best.
My words are starting to twist my life itself. Promises unfulfilled. Words spilled out from my lips before I could even think wisely on the consequences. God, I hate making promises in times of desperation, desperation, to lock my true contemplation, desperation to put a smile on someone else’s face besides mine.
I’m not Gandhi nor am I Mother Teresa, no doubt no one is. Yet, I allow the subtle bliss of locking my true emotions and thoughts just to watch others basking in the complete opposite.
“How long can I go on?” I ask myself. That’s when I find myself stranded in a corner of my room, figuring out answers to questions I know I can’t find, or never allowed myself to find. Days pass by, and repetition takes place. Again I find myself making the same mistake. Over and over again, and again I find myself, nearing to self realizations and constant self questioning. Next thing I know, no change has come.
Even at this very point, as I’m typing, my mind asks the same questions…
“How long can I go on?”
Then again, would this last at least another good 10minutes? Or will I finally bring upon myself a change I deserve? Or will I repeat my promises in disguise all over again? Am I alone in this orb of twisted words and abrupt awakenings?
Oh no! Not another set of questions.
Funny...
Funny...
Funny how I used to be glued to the T.V those days...
Watching Ally Macbeal, Dawsons Creek, Dharma and Greg, The Wonder Years and so many more..
Laughing at jokes I rarely understood...
Smiling when an 'on-screen' kiss happens...
Shutting my eyes tight when clothes fall off...
Funny...
How I used to hum to the soundtracks...
Not understanding the meaning behind it...
Listening to words I could rarely grasp...
Agreeing to Western lifestyle...
Dreaming.. Fantasizing... Imagining...
Would I end up like Greg? With my own Dharma, the love of my live?
Or maybe, someone like Ally ( the male version of course)
Holding a professional job, walking down the street in the morning with my cuppa Starbucks?
What about handling adolescence with innocence, as Kevin Arnold did in The Wonder Years.
Probably, Mulder! Suave and Sleek...Only to speak when needed...
Perhaps, Ross! Living with a bunch of friends seems cool...
(I guess)
Funny...
How it all sums up to the way I think now...
Looking back...
I am glad i had those moments of T.V when i was young...
Imagination is good I say...
Watching those shows again, now I finally get it!
Funny...
How those lines hits you right on the face...
How the songs once meant nothing now says a lot about you..
How the emotions, once just a stage play now relate-able...
How the story, once just a story, now becomes a mirror...
Funny....
Funny how I used to be glued to the T.V those days...
Watching Ally Macbeal, Dawsons Creek, Dharma and Greg, The Wonder Years and so many more..
Laughing at jokes I rarely understood...
Smiling when an 'on-screen' kiss happens...
Shutting my eyes tight when clothes fall off...
Funny...
How I used to hum to the soundtracks...
Not understanding the meaning behind it...
Listening to words I could rarely grasp...
Agreeing to Western lifestyle...
Dreaming.. Fantasizing... Imagining...
Would I end up like Greg? With my own Dharma, the love of my live?
Or maybe, someone like Ally ( the male version of course)
Holding a professional job, walking down the street in the morning with my cuppa Starbucks?
What about handling adolescence with innocence, as Kevin Arnold did in The Wonder Years.
Probably, Mulder! Suave and Sleek...Only to speak when needed...
Perhaps, Ross! Living with a bunch of friends seems cool...
(I guess)
Funny...
How it all sums up to the way I think now...
Looking back...
I am glad i had those moments of T.V when i was young...
Imagination is good I say...
Watching those shows again, now I finally get it!
Funny...
How those lines hits you right on the face...
How the songs once meant nothing now says a lot about you..
How the emotions, once just a stage play now relate-able...
How the story, once just a story, now becomes a mirror...
Funny....
8 gone 9 came...
2008 was weird.
It was a year filled with hopes, happiness, love, procrastinations, destruction, disappointments, and heart ache.
Overwhelming i would say.
I learnt so many new things and i understand how life is.
2009 will be even weirder now..
As, i know there is more knocking on my door.
More great moments and disturbing times.
Well every new year we wish for a better year ahead.
Nothing wrong in that, but, no matter how much we hope and dream..
Nothing happens... Why?
Because i have realized no matter what we die to achieve,
Nothing works out unless we are passionate about it.
Hypocrisy?
Nope!
I now know how life should be lived.
With a strong desire to LIVE i would like to wish everyone...
HAVE A BLESSED 2009...
Endure your life with a smile...
Be nice...
and...
Rock On!
P/S: Thanks to everyone who made 2008 a year worth living in...
I have awaken...
I have awaken
From a deep slumber of ignorance
Ignorance towards myself as a person and the world around
I asked for the purpose of my existence,
I questioned the powers of the Supremacy,
I, now possess the answers,
Answers to questions brewing so strong its catastrophic,
For myself, as well as, the world around,
I now hold the enigma, bewildered with concious-ness,
Wondering what is my next step and where should i place it,
I crave for a cycle of change,
With this answers I now posses the capabilities to change ME.
Patience, empathy, forgiving, maturity in thinking, love, compassion...
Virtues i have ignored and camouflaged,
Camouflaged with narcissism, pretentious-ness, and ignorance,
Ignorance to face the imperfect-ness we all abide by.
I have woken,
To a changed individual,
I shall rise and face the ultimatum,
Leaving every fear far behind,
As I walk along the trails of ...
Genocide
Ever wondered on the purpose of your life?
How often have you caught yourself questioning on your whereabouts in, often many situations?
Dwelling is what I do best. Pondering over every logical (at times illogical) question...
Yet, I have not reached far in my realm of ambiguity.
Farthest I have conquered would be answering objective questions which have had its stand in Google.
Why am I bound to reach roadblock in life, motionless in my own predominant ego?
Why are there times where everything seems so perfectly fitted and nothing else matters, only to stumble upon Lucifer awaiting His chance to snatch it all away for good?
When would I reach my own “nirvana” on earth?
Well that is just the beginning of the adventure I am facing. My very own escapade of discoveries and more un-answered and un-answerable questions...
In a nutshell, I’m stuck! Fluxed with my very own mind playing its countless shenanigans on me...
I have yet to reach a destination where I am content mentally, emotionally, physiologically (and everything in between)
It is a major bane when you are just sitting there like a mannequin, nodding away in momentum of everyone around you. To have your inner feelings suppressed by what others view as the most logical thing you can do... to have others decide for you whilst your heart quivers endlessly, yearning to be heard. Yet your lips seals shut! Shut tight into pure enigma of pathetic-ness. Again I find myself in front of the mirror, stripped bare, in nothingness. Naked with only my questions playing as a robe, protecting my bare skin...
Empty without a sense of direction to where your heading is as similar to committing suicide. Only difference I see is the existence of the physical body during and after the emotional and at times physical pain. What am I doing? Is this what I want in life? See... questions again. I feel lost in my own regime of constrains and desires. Constrains of changes I dislike, desires noted in my diaries, constrains of responsibility I am tangled in, constrains of expectations of others, and so many more, much untold.
Is this what life is all about? Contemplation and aggravation increasing as youth is swallowed by time, is this what life is meant to be like or likewise?
I hope not! If it is.., why am I not happy? If it’s not, where are the secrets hidden for a better life? Are those actually secrets? Myths? Or are those just pure manifestation initiated by generations long time ago? Perhaps ‘happiness’ is strolling through my eyes as I watch it pass away slowly, while I become hyperactively constrained by my own diversion?
I dread not think of the feelings overwhelming me now.
As it would only hamper ‘thee’ in slow death.
(In a non literal sense that is)
Genocide of the mind...
Yeah...
...that is exactly what I would call it.
Emotional Genocide.
~Shhh...~
Ok, things are changing so rapidly now, I feel like I am about to fall off a cliff anytime soon. Just one step forward and there I go falling flat on my face, facing death or paralysis.Drama is the essence of life, but what do you do when the drama becomes violent?
I am living in sheer procrastination and pretentious-ness. (…and I am sick of it…)
Don’t blame me for it as I find no other alternatives. Yet I am confused on how to change myself.
I have sacrificed a lot and hushed them for years… Yet no one sees it and no one even bothers acknowledging it.
Then again, I can’t complain…
Who is there to listen to my cries?
Who is there to tend to my needs?
Who is there to support me like a best friend would?
Who is there to pat me at the back and say it proud, “he is my best friend”
I am losing confidence in all I do, yet again I have to hush things and suppress it to myself…
Is this how things should be?
Or am I being plain dumb and ignorant towards “self-help”?
Hmmmm……..
Compromising & Understanding...
It troubles me when I stumble upon these two words in my head...
No matter how much I try to separate the two infamous words, yet the finale always turns out to be the same. Compromising and understanding, comes hand in hand. We have learned that to enable understanding, we need to compromise. In order to compromise, we need to understand...
What puzzles me is the inability to understand and compromise at certain circumstances. Why does this happen we ask? Well its simple... Not one human being is born equal. Practically every individual are born differently. We develop a contrasting mindset compared to others, thus we are unique in our thinking and our values. As we grow, we are influenced by our surroundings. Media, people we interact with and even family.
A couple in a relationship must ensure the ability to understand and compromises exist between them. However what is there to be done when there is lack of similarities when the two individuals are a major contrast in terms of thinking. Does this bring D-Day to the relationship?
On a personal basis, I find compromise and understanding an easy task to be carried out. It simply emphasizes on empathy. When you put yourself in another person’s shoe, you see the logic in their thoughts, and actions. Such things brings us closer to the objective of understanding and thereafter, compromising.
I find it worthless when a couple separates because of lack of understanding and compromise. Here compromise also generates the idea of sacrifice. Well I have learned that it is crucial for a couple to sacrifice in order to achieve a sustainable relationship.
However, one must never give in too much as too much of something is as fatal as nothing at all...
This can go on as it is a debatable topic; however I would just like to pass this message to my partner...
“Darling, I am compromising and understanding as much as I can...
I am human too, and there are things that I need time to work on...
It doesn’t mean that I have less feelings for you or that I don’t want too..
It just takes time...
I love you... and I will never allow petty matters surpass as a reason for our downfall...
And I definitely expect the same from your side....”
With Love,
~C~
~Overwhelmed.... yet again...
I want to carry you in my arms and sing you a lullaby...
I want to rip you apart and see you suffer...
I want to smack some sense into your empty brain...
I want to idolize that personality I admire...
I want to make love to you all night long...
I want to run away till I’m gone...
Oh, emotions....
What a strange word you are...
You, f*cking manipulative word....
How I wish I could turn back time...
To the day where emotions ran free, dignity never on stake, innocence as white as snow.....
Time.... I really missed you...
Memories... If only I could relive them...
Euphoria... If only it would last...
Me, myself and I...
Long gone...
The Perfect Four
15 March 2008
Apparently Faheem and Amanda came up with a plan to surprise Tasha and I by bringing us out, and the pain they went through covering up was funny!
Though they did spill a little clues yet they managed to pull off a perfect surprise!
It was a trip to Mines Wonderland..
With the right person at the right time it was indeed an amazing trip
We had a great deal of fun strolling around in the train, fooling around with the animals, witnessing Faheem bugging the life of a poor lil parrot, being awed by catching short glimpse on the white tiger. Truly magnificent!
Having Pizza, (thanks for the treat Mandy), watching the musical fountain show (though the songs played was kinda ... ehm... 'different') , freezing ourself's in the Ice Factory, monkey-ing around with the camera, and so much more.
All in all we had an amazing time together, the perfect four!
THANKS MANDY AND FAHEEM!
Love,
C-va
It was one of those days I wished i could re-live!
It was one of those days I wished time would just freeze!
It was one of those days where everything was just perfect!
It was one of those days I wished time would just freeze!
It was one of those days where everything was just perfect!
Apparently Faheem and Amanda came up with a plan to surprise Tasha and I by bringing us out, and the pain they went through covering up was funny!
Though they did spill a little clues yet they managed to pull off a perfect surprise!
It was a trip to Mines Wonderland..
With the right person at the right time it was indeed an amazing trip
We had a great deal of fun strolling around in the train, fooling around with the animals, witnessing Faheem bugging the life of a poor lil parrot, being awed by catching short glimpse on the white tiger. Truly magnificent!
Having Pizza, (thanks for the treat Mandy), watching the musical fountain show (though the songs played was kinda ... ehm... 'different') , freezing ourself's in the Ice Factory, monkey-ing around with the camera, and so much more.
All in all we had an amazing time together, the perfect four!
THANKS MANDY AND FAHEEM!
Love,
C-va
Unconscious brutality.
I am hurting US inside... I am killing US both...
I am “spoiling” what WE have...
I am making things complicating between US...
Should I apologize?
I doubt my apologies will be ever accepted...
I am confused about US...
Whatever I say is used AGAINST me...
Whatever I do raises suspicion in YOU...
You blame YOU...
It’s not about who is wrong or right...
It’s not about who has better answers, or reasons...
It’s about compromise...
It’s about understanding...
I am constantly hurting you unintentionally, yet at times, I wonder why you inflict pain on yourself.
I tell you everything I have in me, and I spill it out, in order to improve US...
Yet, it seems to be not enough...At times you dwell into your own interpretations...
You tend to dwell into your own negative realm...
And that is what hurts the most...
Introducing "Sir.Piggy"
Introducing the new family member... "Sir. Piggy"
He's small and he's cute.. and he eats.. a hell lot!
More updates on Sir Piggy coming soon...
